‘Dumpling’

Last night, right in the middle of a debate that would put an amphetamine junkie to sleep, there was a flash of near-clairvoyant revelation.



Beverly ‘Dumpling’ Perdue (don’t blame me for the nickname; it’s what Mark and Tony and the boys over in the Senate have been calling her for years) and the gnomes over at Perdue Central have been fretting over offshore drilling and they’ve come up with a solution: Let’s fool the suckers.



Up to a week ago, ‘Dumpling’ was “100% opposed” to offshore drilling, saying it will never happen “on my watch.”



But last night she looked Pat McCrory straight in the eye and said she was 100% for it – on every one of the 68 million acres oil companies have under lease.



Which sure sounded like she’s ready to sink a derrick off Cape Hatteras – except not one of those 68 million acres is anywhere near North Carolina. They’re, apparently, somewhere in the Gulf of Mexico.



So ole Dumpling pulled a fast one – she wiggled, connived and purred like a dove to pull the wool over voters’ eyes.



Here’s what Pat McCrory ought to do.



He ought to take that piece of videotape, put it in an ad and say, “I’m going to show you a politician trying to fool you. Watch this” – then, after everyone gets a good look at Bev tap-dancing he ought to say, “Had enough of this kind of politics?”




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Carter Wrenn

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‘Dumpling’

Last night, right in the middle of a debate that would put an amphetamine junkie to sleep, there was a flash of near-clairvoyant revelation.



Beverly ‘Dumpling’ Perdue (don’t blame me for the nickname; it’s what Mark and Tony and the boys over in the Senate have been calling her for years) and the gnomes over at Perdue Central have been fretting over offshore drilling and they’ve come up with a solution: Let’s fool the suckers.



Up to a week ago, ‘Dumpling’ was “100% opposed” to offshore drilling, saying it will never happen “on my watch.”



But last night she looked Pat McCrory straight in the eye and said she was 100% for it – on every one of the 68 million acres oil companies have under lease.



Which sure sounded like she’s ready to sink a derrick off Cape Hatteras – except not one of those 68 million acres is anywhere near North Carolina. They’re, apparently, somewhere in the Gulf of Mexico.



So ole Dumpling pulled a fast one – she wiggled, connived and purred like a dove to pull the wool over voters’ eyes.



Here’s what Pat McCrory ought to do.



He ought to take that piece of videotape, put it in an ad and say, “I’m going to show you a politician trying to fool you. Watch this” – then, after everyone gets a good look at Bev tap-dancing he ought to say, “Had enough of this kind of politics?”




Click Here to discuss and comment on this and other articles.

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Carter Wrenn

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