An Otherworldly Debut

Watching Sarah Palin’s speech, I could not help but think two things.

First, I thought I was watching the rise of a great future star of the Republican Party. She handled herself well, and had a real fire and energy that the ticket previously lacked. Regardless of the outcome of the election, this is someone who will be a major national force for years to come.

My second thought was, “What alternative universe have I fallen in?” I knew either there had been some rip in the space-time continuum and everything that I thought happened over the last decade was no longer true, or I was being grossly misled.

There were more than a handful of times during the speech that my mind was forced to debate this conundrum.

Governor Palin spoke of the change and reform she brought to Alaskan politics. How she was a force for good that rid the state of much of the high-level corruption and scandal that had plagued it for years. But wait – I always thought her party, the Republicans, were already in charge in Alaska before her. And wasn’t she under investigation for some wrongful, personal firings related to her ex-brother-in-law, who was a state trooper? Oh, well.

She mentioned how she had fought the big oil companies and their lobbyists, and wouldn’t ever bow to their interests. I had been under the impression that she was an uncompromising supporter of offshore drilling, and drilling in the Alaskan National Wildlife Refuge. Shoot, I even thought her husband worked for BP on the North Slope.

I remember her talking about her fight against the bridge to nowhere, the famed Ted Stevens project (by the way, didn’t his endorsment help her win the gubernatorial primary? Isn’t he in danger of jail time?) that cost millions to connect a barely-inhabited town to an even-less-inhabited island that already had a functioning ferry connection. But the thing is, I am almost certain she was a big fan of this bridge, at least until it turned into the poster child of big pork projects. I was really starting to be troubled by all of this.

She turned her attention to Barack Obama, assailing him for his lack of support for producing new energy, and on wanting to raise taxes on all Americans. Now I know something is up. His tax plan calls for reduced taxes for all but the richest five percent of the country, and his energy plan called for the most ambitious increase in the production of clean, American energy in history. Now I KNOW this happened. It says so right on his website.

What really got me was she said, “The point of government is to leave the country better than you found it.” Now hold on a second. I could have sworn that it was her party, and the President she supports, that put things in a position that we needed major change in the first place. Her party turned the biggest surplus ever into the biggest deficit ever. We’re in the second major economic downturn of this administration after all-time-high economic prosperity less than ten years ago. People are losing their homes at the fastest rate since the early 1930s. Our senior citizens are choosing between buying food and buying medicine. We’re in the middle of two fierce wars, and have all but lost the respect of the entire world. We live in constant fear of death being rained down upon us by an enemy more intent than ever to destroy our way of life. 4 out of 5 people think the nation is off on the wrong track. Hell, even the entire planet is about to melt. And I could have SWORN the Republicans were already in power, and had been for quite some time.

I hoped I wasn’t being so blatantly lied to, but having fallen into another dimension seemed too far-fetched.

But when I woke up this morning, my Tampa Bay Rays were still in first place. Alternate universe it is.




James Pearce





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An Otherworldly Debut

Watching Sarah Palin’s speech, I could not help but think two things.

First, I thought I was watching the rise of a great future star of the Republican Party. She handled herself well, and had a real fire and energy that the ticket previously lacked. Regardless of the outcome of the election, this is someone who will be a major national force for years to come.

My second thought was, “What alternative universe have I fallen in?” I knew either there had been some rip in the space-time continuum and everything that I thought happened over the last decade was no longer true, or I was being grossly misled.

There were more than a handful of times during the speech that my mind was forced to debate this conundrum.

Governor Palin spoke of the change and reform she brought to Alaskan politics. How she was a force for good that rid the state of much of the high-level corruption and scandal that had plagued it for years. But wait – I always thought her party, the Republicans, were already in charge in Alaska before her. And wasn’t she under investigation for some wrongful, personal firings related to her ex-brother-in-law, who was a state trooper? Oh, well.

She mentioned how she had fought the big oil companies and their lobbyists, and wouldn’t ever bow to their interests. I had been under the impression that she was an uncompromising supporter of offshore drilling, and drilling in the Alaskan National Wildlife Refuge. Shoot, I even thought her husband worked for BP on the North Slope.

I remember her talking about her fight against the bridge to nowhere, the famed Ted Stevens project (by the way, didn’t his endorsment help her win the gubernatorial primary? Isn’t he in danger of jail time?) that cost millions to connect a barely-inhabited town to an even-less-inhabited island that already had a functioning ferry connection. But the thing is, I am almost certain she was a big fan of this bridge, at least until it turned into the poster child of big pork projects. I was really starting to be troubled by all of this.

She turned her attention to Barack Obama, assailing him for his lack of support for producing new energy, and on wanting to raise taxes on all Americans. Now I know something is up. His tax plan calls for reduced taxes for all but the richest five percent of the country, and his energy plan called for the most ambitious increase in the production of clean, American energy in history. Now I KNOW this happened. It says so right on his website.

What really got me was she said, “The point of government is to leave the country better than you found it.” Now hold on a second. I could have sworn that it was her party, and the President she supports, that put things in a position that we needed major change in the first place. Her party turned the biggest surplus ever into the biggest deficit ever. We’re in the second major economic downturn of this administration after all-time-high economic prosperity less than ten years ago. People are losing their homes at the fastest rate since the early 1930s. Our senior citizens are choosing between buying food and buying medicine. We’re in the middle of two fierce wars, and have all but lost the respect of the entire world. We live in constant fear of death being rained down upon us by an enemy more intent than ever to destroy our way of life. 4 out of 5 people think the nation is off on the wrong track. Hell, even the entire planet is about to melt. And I could have SWORN the Republicans were already in power, and had been for quite some time.

I hoped I wasn’t being so blatantly lied to, but having fallen into another dimension seemed too far-fetched.

But when I woke up this morning, my Tampa Bay Rays were still in first place. Alternate universe it is.




James Pearce





Click Here to discuss and comment on this and other articles.

Avatar photo

Gary Pearce

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