Barlow Herget of State Government Radio asked me a question that reminded me of what I’m missing this time of year: “What’s happening inside a statewide campaign now?”

Unfortunately, polisci students, campaigns right now are not just about strategy, media and organization. They’re also doing a lot of math:

• Fundraising: How much money is in hand, and how much more can we raise?
  
• Polls: Ours and anybody else’s we can get hold of. How are we doing? Where are we up and where are we down? What demographic groups? Which ads are working and which aren’t?
  
• GRPs: That is, Gross Rating Points – the measure of how many times a given ad has been seen. And how do we divvy up the GRPs we have left?

On top of the math, you have people calling every day to tell you what you’re doing wrong and what you ought to do. Almost none of whom have ever run a campaign. Including the candidate, his (or her) family, friends and business or law partners. But attention must be paid.

About one idea out of every 20 is good. You have to figure out which 19 to ignore.

On top of the mental strain, there is the mind-numbing stress and physical fatigue. You go from before sunrise until you collapse at night. The cell phone and the Blackberry never stop. The conference calls stack up like planes at O’Hare. You’re fueled with coffee and Diet Cokes all day long. Your first thought every morning: 50 days to go. Can I make it? Weekends? Forget them.

Only the most disciplined find time to exercise. And when it comes to food, there are two schools: Scarfers and starvers. The scarfers (like me) eat everything, especially doughnuts and burgers. Average weight gain per campaign: 15 pounds. The starvers can’t eat, and their clothes hang off them.

Weighing over it all is the sheer terror of losing. As James Carville once said, the best thing about winning a campaign is that you didn’t lose.

It’s a wonderful life. I miss it so.

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